12 Types of people you'll meet at a Europe music festival
You think you know how festivals in Europe are done? Well we’re here to tell you that we’ve been to them all and seen it all, and these are the 12 characters you’re guaranteed to meet at your next Europe music festival.
And if this makes you itch for the next Euro summer festy (or your first), don’t worry because this month we’ve got the hottest festivals on sale plus the cheap af flights to get you there. Yes, we’re talking $999 Black Market return flights to Europe and these HOT festival tour packages:
- Busabout Ultra Europe + Ultra Sail Croatia
- Busabout Lollapalooza Festival, Berlin
- Contiki Sounds- Reading Festival, UK
- Entourage Tours Yacht Week Croatia + Hideout Festival
- Topdeck Road to Sziget tour, Hungary
1.The hula hoopers
They will be around long after the cockroaches have been wiped off the face of the earth and we won’t understand any more about them then than we do now. They are a nonsensical phenomenon that will crawl out from wherever they come from and be present at every European festival forever.
2.The girl who is lost/has lost her bag
Sometimes it’s the girl who is quietly meandering by herself looking like she’s about to cry (go and help that girl) and sometimes it’s your best friend and since you’ve both been smart and stuck together she’s just going to skull a vodka Redbull (courtesy of your wallet), get on with the show and worry about it tomorrow.
3.The guy catching up on some sleep
Comfily catching up on some zzz’s next to a fence at the end of a three-day festival while standing up, or experiencing something else entirely, we’ll let you be the judge of that.
4.The girls who are here for the gram
Instagram that is. Also closely related to the people who watch the whole festival through their phone. Avoid those people, you don’t want to get sucked into the bore of spending 4 hours doing/getting your hair and makeup done before the festival even begins and count that as ‘the best part’.
5.The flower children
See also Penny Lane wannabes. These people are chill, maybe a little too chill but are the ones who are going to spark up a lively monologue (yep monologue because you’re not gonna get a word in) about Japan whaling ships, fracking in the NT and how cow farts are killing the planet, at 3 am when you want to go to bed. Their heart is in the right place and there’s nothing wrong with their arguments but you know, there’s a time and a place for that.
6.The family with a baby
Anyone who can manage to bring their baby to a music festival (in those cute lil ear muffs) and still have a good time deserves all of the R.E.S.P.E.C.T. That is all.
7.The people of the mud
AVOID THOSE PEOPLE unless you would like to join their muddy cult.
8.The solo dancer
Bless. Also make sure not to get in their way, unless you’re joining in to pick up some of their fantastic moves.
9.The fence jumpers
Pretty easily spotted, doesn’t have a wristband. We hate them because we actually paid $5,000,000,000,000 to be here, unless we are them, in which case carry on.
10.The guy/girl who went too hard too early
Also closely related to the guy catching up on some zzz’s and the person who forgot that there was a festival to attend after sailing Croatia for a week. Please make sure to draw a moustache on them with a sharpie then give them some sort of makeshift pillow.
11.The ‘my body is a temple’ vegans
Who can justify the vodka shots (and other things) because vodka comes from potatoes, right?
12. The girl who forgot
That wearing overalls/a playsuit to a festival is the worst idea ever when it comes time to breaking the seal and you have to pee 55 times in the course of an hour. Don’t be that girl no matter how cute you look, you will drop a strap in the porta potty, it’s not worth it.
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